Tuesday, 24 December 2013

Thanks J.M Green, you nailed that one.
I think if the star isn't either fictional & symbolic or Tinkerbell then the next best bet is that the star was the Starship Enterprise which had visited Nazareth 9 months earlier, beaming down Captain James T. Kirk who had a one night stand with Mary. Mary thought Kirk was God because of how the teleporter beam looked when he beamed down, plus he was clean & dressed in space age clothes & aftershave, compared to Joseph who bore a strong resemblance to a billy goat. The ( Luke 2 ) angels that the shepherds reported were other members of the Enterprise who beamed down to see the son of Kirk. The baby was named Christ Almighty because Kirk said, " Christ Almighty he is just like me " when he saw how similar Mary's boy child looked. Obviously the rest just falls into place; Kirk returns 30 years later to save his son Christ Almighty from the cross and beams him up to the Enterprise in Acts 1v9. He said he would return and he did - in 1966 [ they flipped the first 6 to be a 9 to disguise the 666 ]. There has been an elaborate deception going on to make everyone think that the Star Trek series was just a fantasy drama filmed in a studio but in fact it is real footage of exploration through the universe. The NT has now been fulfilled and the chosen ones will be taken to an exoplanet in another galaxy. Captian Kirk hadn't aged much because he spent a lot of time travelling near the speed of light.
That Kirk is the real father of Christ also explains how Jesus is shown in paintings as a white man.
Obviously Kirk had to go back in time through a worm hole
Those who thought the Bible was no less fictional that Star Trek, were correct - they are both real, it's just that people have mistaken super advanced technology for God. In reality there is no God. I expect it was the Enterprise that used its lasers to scorch Elijah's offering in 1 King 18v38. Possibly the Enterprise also used it tractor beam to slow the rotation of the Earth to allow Joshua to win the battle as recounted by Joshua 10, also blasting the Amorites with canon, mistaken for hail stones. I haven't asked Captain T. Kirk about this last part so I am just guessing. I could be mistaken.

NB the T in Kirk stands for Tiberius which could be how the Sea of Galilee is know as lake Tiberius
" Where no man has gone before " is obviously the original version of John 14v6, " I am the way, No man comes to the father except by me "
" Kirk " would also explain the switch form Synagogue to Kirk / church, Matt 16v18 { My God, I have unlocked the key to the truth ? ! Oh no, now MI6 will be out to get me. I know too much ;-) } So Peter is to be a security guard on the Enterprise. Matt 18v20 " Then Jesus warned them not to tell anyone he was Christ Kirk, the son of Captain T Kirk "

Wednesday, 11 December 2013

Thus saith the Lord God Almighty

And  in the third year of the reign of King Ahaz, I  the prophet Isaiah did prophecy: " While walking in the desert of Zin the earth around me did quake and the wind did howl, then amid the storm I heard the still clear voice of the Lord God Almighty. Hear o people of Israel what the Lord your God saith unto you. " Yeh the cries of the people have risen to me asking, " Where is this God you speak of, is he but a human construct, nothing but wild fantasy and delusion ? Well, I the almighty & awesome God need not lower myself to answering that question. Indeed I fear that I may not be best placed to answer it since much of what I say is only half true. However there shall come a prophet in the future by the name of John Loftus and he shall show that the evidence suggests that it is wildly improbable that I exist. Well credit where credit is due; I have to give John Loftus the prize for guessing correctly that I am no more than a mind game, Yes, it is time to come clean, I am a fraud and you have all been conned, so there, that is the awful truth and I feel much better for having admitted it too myself. i am nothing more than a collective human consciousness. Really sorry for any hopes raised & dashed, I'm afraid that I can't really offer you a heaven to go to but on the bright side no hell either. So it just shows that you can't win"
Then I the prophet Isaiah saith, " And so that might be the final word from our Lord God Almighty, and since he no longer exists it may be time to make my exist too, Byeeee "

Tuesday, 10 December 2013



Oh greatly incompetent God. I give thanks that there is none like you. Truly it would be an act of the most stupendous incompetence to allow a hell to come into existence and then lose most of the human race into it. To only manage to partly remedy the situation would be hard to exceed. To fail to completely undo the damage would earn you the crown of incompetence. Hail, for you would be the greatest in this respect if it was true.

Oh king of ignorance, dim wittedness  & paralysis of mind, we acknowledge that we have been made in your image by ministers who have taught us. We are witnesses to your character

Oh God of infinite brutality & cruelty, if the stories the Bible authors tell about you are true. We bow in
horror before your almighty barbarity. Forgive us that though we would offer unquestioning loyalty and allegiance & service to you [ in theory ] yet  our desire to stay out of prison and to live a decent life forbids that we act out what Bible authors indicate you would authorize.

Oh God who in the beginning created a circle and then said, " Oh fizzing fury & rage, I meant to create a square, how on Earth am I ever going to bring about a decent quality of life for the human animal in a
biological system where they are little better off than the sparrow and most of their offspring must end up as prey if their numbers are not to exceed the ability of their habitat to sustain them. Shit and damn that I spent an eternity in the planning but still managed to overlook some fairly basic design flaws "

Oh God of unlimited contradictions, who is simultaneously good and evil or otherwise mysterious if ministers are to be believed. Help us just to accept that you are beyond sense or understanding.

Oh God who is the source of all flaws, you are the potter and we the potty, we recognize the bullshit you deposit in us. We pray that it might be put to good use in fertilizing new growth.

Lord God, we are not worthy of you and so must decline your presence in our lives

For God's sake amen.

Saturday, 7 December 2013

Warped imaginings verses best practice

My interpretation of Genesis 22 is that Abraham was going to follow the errant culture of his society by offering a child sacrifice because he thought it would appease the gods but that a real loving God intervened to say,  " Stop, I the cosmic loving, caring God would never ask or want a human sacrifice " See Hosea 6v6 , For I desire mercy, not sacrifice and acknowledgment of God rather than burnt offerings. Now celebrate that you didn't do such a barbaric act. Make a barbecue, I fancy roast goat, well done with french fries and salad, Mmmm I'm loving the aroma.

And then God said to Abraham, " Go and offer your son Isaac as a sacrifice to me "
Abrham replied, " Are you out of your God damn mind ? There is no way I am doing that - it would be murder, and for what - nothing
And God replied,  " Bravo sir, a most excellent ethical decision, I can see I taught you well. i was just testing to see if you would reply on your own mind rather than being a cowering yes man "


And then Satan came in the guise of God and said to Abraham, " Go and sacrifice Isaac to me to prove
that you would hold nothing back from me "
But Abraham replied, " No, I would rather slay myself, surely ones own life is more valuable to oneself than anything else. But what would killing people achieve anyway ? Nothing as far as I can see. Surely a loving God would rather that people live in a caring, loving way, cooperating, helping each other to a better quality of life ?


And then Abraham thought he heard God say, " Go and offer your son Isaac as a sacrifice to me "

And Abraham said to Isaac, " We must go into the wilderness, God summons us "

And then God said, " Abraham you are out of your freaking mind if you think that I would ever ask for any sort of human sacrifice. Tell everyone that they must not do human or animal sacrifices any more. What I want is for you to go and invent technology to deliver material & intellectual improvements to standards of living- clean water, better clothes, more interesting past times, musical instruments, medicine, higher yields in agriculture, population control. A social security system "


In life we can imagine that we are thinking reasonable ideas and choosing sensible paths but others might spot that we are making decisions based on pessimistic worst case imaginings about what might happen in the future. Sometimes it takes other people to intervene with an idea to help us to see things from a more positive perspective or to realize parts of the debate which would change the balance of your thinking and help you to make a choice that you would not regret in the long term over one that you would very much regret. However every decision has trade offs. You can maximize one aspect but often only at the expense of another aspect.

With any instruction there is the question of whether the person receiving has correctly heard and correctly understood the instruction. Did they interpret it as was intended ? Was the instruction what the person meant to give or did it contain an error ? If the person receiving the instruction thinks it did not make sense then they should query it. Perhaps the most disturbing thing about the Genesis 22 story is that Abraham didn't even question it, he might have asked himself if he had misheard or misunderstood or if God was ill at that point or mistaken to ask it.


And then God said to Abraham, " Now take Isaac and offer him as a sacrifice to me "
Then Abraham thought, " Oh my God, he is on one of his mentally ill flights of fantasy delusion again, what can I say to him this time, I must talk him out of it or call 911 "
Then Abraham said to God, " Are you feeling ok God ? What has brought you to the point of requesting that I sacrifice my son Isaac ? Doesn't that seem like barbaric, pointless murder to you , because it looks that way to me and so I must refuse both because I do not want to do it and because my society will rightly arrest me and put me in prison if I attempt to do it, and for a very long time if I carry it out "
And God said to Abraham, " Well you have a point there, now that you point it out I can see that it would be barbaric , I just wanted to see if you really would give your undivided loyalty to me but I can see that your allegiance is really to a high standard to ethics. "

Friday, 6 December 2013

Richard Dawkins on Premier Christian Radio interviewed by Justin Brierley

Richard Dawkins is going to be debating the Old Testament on Premier Christian Radio tomorrow 7th December. They might be debating Genesis ch 22 since there is also a link to Not Wright giving the tired & twisted interpretation, probably by the power of the Holy Spirit; otherwise known as being unhealthily introverted and lost in yourself, chasing your own tail etc
Why not just say that it was insane of Abraham to agree to sacrifice Isaac for nothing? The story is probably mythical but if the thought occurred to Abraham to sacrifice Isaac he should have responded, " No, I am not going to follow that barbaric superstitious practice even if it is an accepted practice of the culture of the times I live in, I think a good god would not be pleased with such an act and I find the idea abhorrent. So no I won't do it " Genesis 22 story is a case study warning of how twisted thinking can convince people they are doing something virtuous when to any sane outsider it is obviously a deranged act.
UK Channel 4 with astronomer Allan Chapman re. Greek mythology about the stars. One myth was about the god Uranus. It sounds like a very similar type of story to Abraham/Isaac. Uranus imprisoned Gaia's youngest children in Tartarus, deep within Earth, where they caused pain to Gaia. She shaped a great flint-bladed sickle and asked her sons to castrate Uranus. Only Cronus, youngest and most ambitious of the Titans, was willing: he ambushed his father and castrated him, casting the severed testicles into the sea.
For this fearful deed, Uranus called his sons Titanes Theoi, or "Straining Gods. From the blood that spilled from Uranus onto the Earth came forth the Giants, the Erinyes (the avenging Furies), the Meliae (the ash-tree nymphs), and, according to some, the Telchines. He was also responsible for spilling his blood into the Mediterranean Sea. The next day, bubbles came out from the spill of Uranus's blood, Aphrodite, goddess of love and beauty was born.

Sunday, 1 December 2013


Parody on " Oh for the wings of a dove "
See " George sings o for the wings of a dove " acp1937 channel
Oh for the books, for the books of John Loftus
To free me from the net of religion
Oh for the writings, for the writings of John Loftus
Far away, far away, far away from Christianity would I roam
I would know reasons to think there were no gods
And no supernatural realm either
consider all the possibilities & focus on probabilities
turn my back on bible nonsense & study science.
In the wilderness built John a blog
To remove from folks eye religion's log
In the wilderness he built a website
To show that christian faith is not too bright

November 2015 review of "How to defend the Christian faith" by John W. Loftus
posted here anachronistically:

Church services tend to be a bit of a one way street with the minister giving out his point of view with very little feed back. Contrast this situation with a parliament debating chamber where lots of different points of view are heard. So if you ever wondered about a 2nd opinion now there is an easy way to anonymously find out- ask honest John. He won't force 'answers' on you but rather help equip you with the skills to find out and give a few handy pointers. Is John the one who has come to lead us into all truth ?

How many people sat in the congregation agree with each point the minister has made ? Even the Bible presents a picture of conflicting theological opinions. The New Testament tells of synagogues where Pharisees were at odds with Sadducees over various ideas e.g. Acts 23v8 "The Sadducees say there is no resurrection, and that there are neither angels nor spirits, but the Pharisees acknowledge them all"
The fact that ministers try to persuade people in the congregation to change their opinion shows that he thinks they currently hold other views.

The gospels speak of Jesus being in the synagogue but having some radically different views from those around him. John Loftus points out that there has been a wide range of opinions & interpretations among Bible scholars such as those of Karl Barth,mentioned in chapter 4.
( By the way, I have read that synagogues didn't become a common feature until the fall of the Temple of Jerusalem and following diaspora so their presence in the gospels might be an anachronism ? Not sure if that is correct )

Luke 14v31-32 offers the example of going into battle where you should work out if you can win before engaging and if not then ask for terms of peace. John offers that it is wise to find the most weighty challenges to Christian doctrines to see if those doctrines really are true or not. If the idea is true then it should be able to overcome all contenders. In any case it makes life more interesting if you are aware of the many aspects to each issue.

I liked part 3 the best,"How to defend God in a world of pain" especially chapter 16,"Ignore this empirical refutation of Christianity"

Chapter 6 "How to know which religion to defend" mentions the 'Outsider test of faith' which I think is a valuable tool but I would quibble that it is more helpful to look at the pros and cons of each idea no matter where it is found. What is the best reaction to each of the notions in the Bible ? It is possible to cherry pick ideas and this is what many people do. Many modern day Christians hold personal creeds which wisely have only the faintest relationship to ideas in the Bible. If you had a personal relationship with Jesus would you find out that he had radically altered his views from how the New Testament portrays them ? Perhaps Jesus would now view the Bible mainly as an interesting contrast to his current theology ? Would a 21st century Jesus go through each matter in the Bible and ask if there was a less violent, more civilized way of dealing with each issue or negotiating to resolve the conflict of interests ? Perhaps the 21st century Jesus has been born again and if not then maybe he needs to be ? Maybe he hasn't returned due to being too embarrassed by some of the things people quoted him as saying ?

Join the voyage of discovery

This book is about exploring the many aspects of Christianity and their place in modern civilization

Wednesday, 27 November 2013

Parody on " What a friend we have in Jesus "

Parody on " What a friend we have in Jesus " 
[ arendientje youtube channel does a southern gospel version ]

What a friend we have in Loftus
All our Bible fears allayed
giving truths based on science & reason
to those who the church betrayed

Oh what peace we often forfeit
oh what needless worries we bare
for those who have not studied debunkingchristianity
and his books advertised there

Are you weak and heavy laden
with a load of christianity
why not do yourself a favour, 
jettison it's negativity
well maybe it has few good bits
but its mostly fictional crap
by studying the books of  John W. Loftus
You may stick a feather of reason in your cap
alternative [ adjust the balance of thinking under your cap ]

No. 74 Mark 15v34. "At the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "My God, why have you forsaken me?"
ReWrit v35 When some freethinkers in the crowd heard this, they said, "Maybe it is just that God has a vastly understaffed call centre, but you spent last night trying to get through at an off peak time so it seems more likely that it is because there is no God or supernatural realm"
And Jesus wept, "Do you mean I am going to die for nothing?"
The freethinkers replied,"Well to us it looks like it. There is no evidence that you have been in contact with a source of advanced knowledge. Let's face it, what sort of useful information have you ever received in your imagined chats with God? You claim God is your all knowing heavenly Father but it looks to have been a very dysfunctional relationship. There is no sign that God has shared much information with you. Perhaps you just immediately forget it or keep it to yourself ? However you also claimed you were One with the Father so where is your excuse for not knowing all He knows ?
We have a secret source of future knowledge and we can say with some certainty that your imagined God never even told you the facts of life on Earth e.g that the Earth is a sphere orbiting the Sun, that life on Earth started 4 billion years ago and evolved by natural selection, that micro organisms are a major cause if illness, that nutrient deficiency is another cause of poor health, or that one day man will walk on the moon, fly in the sky and dive to the deepest regions of the oceans. That in the latter five hundred years of the next two millennia there will be such advances in science and technology that if you witnessed it would make you think that either you were totally forsaken and left in the dark by your God or that you had been completely mistaken about such a God existing. We think you should have payed more attention to Pilate's words, 'What is truth ?' Maybe if you had considered an outsiders perspective on your ideas you would have reconsidered them ?
Then Jesus cried out," Forgive me I knew not what I was doing" and with that breathed his last.
And the freethinkers shook their heads sorrowfully over another wasted life. One sighed, pity he never had the chance to drive a quad bike on water"

Tuesday, 19 November 2013

On a theme of " The Needletoe Letters " by Robert M. Price

C.S.Lewis died on the same day as John F. Kennedy and Aldous Huxley, 22 November 1963. To mark the event BBC radio 4 has readings from " The Screwtape letters " . They can also be heard on Youtube narrated by John Cleese. There is mention of materialist world view and skepticism in the letters so people might investigate those ideas on wikipedia & also check out atheism since Lewis was interested in that in his early adulthood.

In my opinion Lewis', " Screw You letters " demonstrates that the scripts of devilish speech by Bible authors were likely little more than what Lewis was attempting- fiction & mind games. 

I think there is no supernatural realm but what would a line manager devil ( Bishop ) say to an operational grade devil ( priest ) now adays ?

ScrewYou : My dear TapeWorm. It has come to my attention that we have a serious problem on the horizon, by the name of John Loftus. As you well know our bread & butter stems from misery & woe among humans and we have a rich seam of grief from the fear that people have of us lurking nearby ready to pounce on them. We have been able to monetize that for centuries. It was one of our greatest achievements getting the existence of hell and devils written as fact in the Bible, billions have come running to us begging us to help save them and issue reassurances for a very modest fee. Quite a stroke of twisted double think, even if I do say so myself, telling them devils were very real yet at the same time that the patients would probably be protected [ if they remained in the love of Christ, whatever that means ] 

Sadly I now fear the influence of those ideas is being eroded by the writings of said John Loftus. He is going around giving a myriad of reasons to think there is no supernatural realm, neither God nor Satan. He is allaying fears about hell. This will never do. 

What ever happens put your patients off surfing the web, make them afraid they will be hacked, phished or something. Then you must whip up the tried and tested fears of hell again, focus their attention on it,  try to make them so afraid of hell that they will not begin to explore atheism, the more paranoid and closed off they are to new ideas the better. And for God's sake don't let them get a hint of debunkingchristianity. I see that " The Screwtape letters " will be on BBC Radio 4 , this could be helpful to us in stoking the fear of the devil & the abominable human biblegod but just don't let the producer allow mention of " The Needletoe letters " by Robert M. Price.

We really must redouble our efforts to draw people down into our insidious vortex of delusion. Try to muddle their thinking about the fact of evolution and so distract them & use up their spare time that they never get round to serious study of science & history. The pseudo history of the Bible should be a good dummy tit for this. Our very livelihood depends on it.


At the end of " The Screwtape letters " I think that Lewis scores an own goal because he has Screwtape echoing the ideas of the apologist preacher who makes it sound certain that people can simply sign up to be a christian by saying the sinners prayer be guaranteed to go to heaven, where as the Bible is much less clear about what it takes to get to heaven. The way the Bible talks about God being the one who chooses, then who could know they were a chosen one ? What must you truly believe exactly ? How would you know what was going to happen at the judgement day ? What if you hadn't given all your money to the poor, what if you had remarried, what if you hadn't been more faithful than the pharisees in keeping the law ? 
   Wouldn't a real devil say on the death of Wormwood's " christian " patient , well never mind because odds on that he will be a reject for falling short of the small print and Christ will say " Get away from me,  I never knew you " or " Tough, I never chose you " .

The interesting question being that if Screwtape could be so black and white & straightforward about someone signing up to Christianity going directly to heaven then how come there is so much uncertainty and so many provisos in the Bible ? Wouldn't it have been more in keeping with the Satanic realm that Jesus had made heaven the default position but that Satan muddled the Bible texts making it appear as an almost impenetrably complex maze to win through ?


Stephen Law has written a parody of the screwtape letters in his book " Believing bullshit " called " The Tapescrew letters ". It can be read on his website
B.F.Moloney has written an atheist parody, " Screwtape lost and found- Charity's variety of sins "

Saturday, 16 November 2013

The death of Jesus in the manner of the Black knight from Monty Python

ReWrit John 19v32
The death of Jesus,
 in the manner of the Black knight from Monty Python's, " Holy Grail "
Because the Jews wanted the men on the crosses to be dead before the Sabbath they asked Pilate to hurry it up a bit. So Pilate gave the nod to the soldiers and one went with a bardiche and mocked  Jesus, " You saved others, save yourself "
" None shall pass the bridge to life unless they pass by me ", said Jesus
And the soldier chopped off  Jesus right leg.
" Oh, that was rather sore, but only a flesh wound " said Jesus, very reservedly, " that was below the belt but I forgive you "
Then another soldier struck off Jesus left leg with a halberd.
 " How excruciatingly painful " exclaimed Jesus politely as he hung from only his arms and found it a wee bit more difficult to breathe
Then another soldier struck off Jesus head with a pollaxe and it fell to the ground
 " How awfully painful ", shrieked Jesus, " but I am invincible, I will pray for you, have you no conscience ? "
" I thought cutting your head off would put you out of your misery " said the soldier apologetically, " I am sore amazed that you are still alive, truly you are a son of God "
And Jesus replied, very serenely, " You know not what you do. Just wait, for in nearly 2.25 days time you will see me all joined back together in my resurrection body before I disappear back to the 7th dimensional universe to be with the living  God "
And all who listened thought, either we are hallucinating or this is evidence of a supernatural realm, for talking heads are outwith our usual experience of life.

Friday, 15 November 2013

So many people really are that dim, therefore God exists.

Too many people really are that dim, therefore God exists.
Was Jesus as thick as the two short planks he was nailed to ?
Just kidding !
Knock knock
Who's there ?
Nobody who ?
No body cause Jesus was a fictional character ?

Luke 24v2 They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. 
Then Mary the mother of James said to Mary Magdalene, " Was Jesus really real or did we just imagine him ? "
 And Mary replied, "How contrary ! What are you saying?  You think that Jesus was just a literary character or a device used by a priest to control us ? That we just trusted the priests & our parents unduly on this? "
 Mary, " Pinch me to make sure I am  not dreaming " 
Mary, " I didn't feel a thing when you pinched me, What if we are not real either ? "
 Mary, " How perfectly dreadful, then who would look after our families ? "
Mary, " But if we are not real maybe they are not real either, where is this all going to end, who is real in this story ? If we are not real how can we speak to each other ? "
Then out of the fog a figure appeared.
Mary, " Sir who are you "
Figure, " It is I, Pontius Pilatus and who pray tell are you ? "
Mary, " I am Mary the mother or James, follower of Christ, what have you done with his body ? "
Pontius Pilate, " I know not who you speak of "
Mary, " But you sentenced Jesus to death on the cross barely a couple of days ago "
Pontius Pilate, " I know nothing of this. I delegate crucifictions to others. Now I am busy so must wash my hands of this matter "

Tuesday, 12 November 2013


It's the most nightmarish time of the year
If you are a turkey
 then unless you are lucky
You'll be dead I fear
It's the most nightmarish time of the year

It's the most miserable time of the year
If you haven't got money
And your tummy is rumbly
Then for you I fear
It's could be the most depressing time of the year

It's the most lucrative time of the year
If you sell Christmas cards,
mistletoe or holly
Then for you I fear
It could be the only lucrative time of the year

It's the most wonderful time of the year
If you're into skiing
and the snow is falling
and if a ski slope is near
 it may be the most wonderful time of the year

Friday, 8 November 2013



See him lying on a bed of straw
Wondering if Joseph really was his da
Or if his mother just had a fling ?
With a free spirit who came fucking ?

Which bits are fiction and which bits real ?
Do priests have much, to conceal ?
A literary creation, like a script ?
Incorporating ideas from Egyptian crypt ?

[ If you are not sure of the words in church just stick with " lie ". Quite important to get the accent in the right place ]
Lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie
Lie lie lie lie lie lie truth ( things are seldom black and white )

See them lying on a pad of paper
Inventing stories of a holy caper
making folk worry about when they die
making a living out of a bloody lie



Praise my tongue the king of heaven
If he's not like the Bible paints
Praise him if we're strictly mortal
And no hell for anyone awaits
Praise him, criticize him, Praise him, criticise him ?
If the Bible is errant

Praise him if he has an excuse
For not doing the good  he should
Maybe he's ill or away on holiday ?
Or maybe he has simply passed away ?
Praise him, cristicise him, Praise him, criticize him ?
If Jesus has been misquoted

Is it fact or is it fiction ?
Or a mixture in between?
Is it real or is it unreal
Is there no supernatural realm ?
Can we know ? Were is the evidence ?
Could it be  we are alone ?

Praise my tongue the king of heaven
Though I doubt that he exists
and I hope the bible's fiction
and wonder how it still persists
criticize him, criticize him, criticize him, criticize him
criticism is what he is worthy of

Criticize my tongue the God of the Bible
if he'd let men rot in hell
criticize him if he has the power
but would let us suffer on earth as well
mock him, mock him , mock him, mock him
mock the image that men call God



The life thou gavest lord has ended
another slips down the chute to hell
I wonder lord if you ever worry
that you will end up there as well

To have the power to avoid it
yet let us rot is sort of  sin
and if with love you'd analyse it
the doctrine of hell you'd chuck in the bin

Wednesday, 6 November 2013


How would anyone know that the words of Jesus weren't censored ?

The cut ofF bits of the Bible you never realized you wanted to read about &
The verses of the gospels which were deliberately lost; bowdlerized :

Matt 27v39 : Those who passed by hurled insults at him, shaking their heads and saying, " You who are going to destroy the temple and build it in 3 days,save yourself ! Come down from the cross, if you are the Son of God " 
At that moment Jesus temper snapped from top to bottom, his patience torn in two

Jesus: " Fuckin hell bitches, You good for nothing humanity. One more word from any one of you and I will bloody well will come down and smash your wretched faces in. Pieces of shit, I'll get you back for this, just you wait. You'll regret this, know nothing scum bags. To think I'm dying for you and all you can do is mock, ungrateful, damn you "
Matt 27v41 But the chief priests, the teachers of the law and the elders mocked him, " He saved others but he can't  save himself "

At that moment Jesus did a Thor 2, the incredible hulk in him was awakened and he ripped his hands off the nails, breaking the ropes, bent over and pulled the nails out of his feet with his bare hands. Then jumped to the ground. He wrenched the cross out of the ground and slung it around wiping out 250 people who stood nearby, including several Roman soldiers. He seized their swords and with one in each hand ran a muck through the crowds slaughtering them indiscriminately.

   Then there were flashes of lightning and rumbles of thunder, the tombs split open and those who came forth grabbed the swords and daggers of the fallen and continued the massacre of all present.. Then Jesus signalled the living dead to pick up his cross and follow him. They flew up in the air and together charged upon the temple & swinging the cross, which seemed indestructible, knocked the Temple to pieces. Each piece seemed to turn to dust at it was hit for six. ( This explains how there is so little evidence of the temple )

Jesus did many other things, and are they not recorded in the other inspired lost gospels

Monday, 4 November 2013


One tactic we might have expected to see used by the Bible devil is to have people coming up to Jesus and say there is no supernatural realm, no God, no demons.
Then Jesus could say they were speaking the devil's wily tricks
Acts 17v32 comes close, " When the Epicureans and Stoics heard about the resurrection of the dead, some of them sneered " 
It could have continued, " some of them sneered it looks to us that there is no supernatural realm, no god, no afterlife, we see no evidence for it. We think you are making stuff up. We follow the atomist philosophy. If God is all powerful then how does he allow so much suffering etc?" 
I wonder if an early copy of Acts 17v32 mention the possibility that there is no supernatural realm and then a priest later censored the sentence because he wanted to keep people in the dark & not give too much food for thought. Maybe the original author self censored. Even though he was well aware of people saying there were no gods he cut back that idea.
Did the Bible writers & editors know more about the spectrum of ideas in the world than they let on or were they genuinely ignorant ?
When you think of all the things the Bibledevil could have said to undermine the credibility of Jesus or existence of BibleGod, but didn't, then you have to wonder if the authors censored it out or was the Bibledevil really that stupid & feeble ? Bible Satan was actually Jesus cheerleader & team mate who seconded the idea that God & a supernatural realm existed.

Sunday, 3 November 2013

The latest testament of Christ

THE LAST TESTAMENT OF CHRIST: In which John Loftus appears as the devil's advocate and makes Satan look like he was on L plates

Luke 4v2 And Jesus, full of the bullshit of the priests who wrote for him,  was led out into the desert where for 40 days he was tested by John L.
John L: Prove to us that you are not just mostly a fictional, literary creation.
Jesus: Prove that I am not fictional, if you get it wrong you will burn in hell for ever.
John L. If you have real contact with a cosmic God then tell us, does the Sun revolve round the Earth or the Earth orbit round the Sun
Jesus: I tell you the truth, red sky at night shepherds delight, therefore God exists
John L:  If you are the Son of God then carve on a flat sandstone block an exact representation of the far side of the moon.
Jesus:That is not fair, I am a carpenter not a stone mason, but in any case it probably looks similar to what you see 
John L:  Tell us if men will ever walk on the moon, will there be air there for them to breathe ? 
Jesus: I tell you the truth. 3 Men shall travel to the moon in the Apollo 11 spacecraft carried by a rocket called Saturn V. The rocket will look like a massive temple column with flames coming out the bottom. The 2 men who land on the moon will have a suit filled with oxygen from Earth 
John L: If you are a real supernatural entity and not just telling us things by the power of a 21st century speech writer then fly up to the moon right now and leave massive tablets of stone in the Sea of Tranquility with your name on so that the Apollo 11 men will find them and be sore amazed 
Jesus: John 20v29 Blessed are those who have not seen such things yet have believed
John 19, The death of Jesus
Now although it was usual to leave the bodies on the cross for vultures & carrion crows to peck at, the Roman soldiers had been so impressed by Jesus peaceful death that they made an exception and  took down the cross and found a claw hammer from somewhere to prize the nails out. " Phew " said one soldier, " I'm glad we don't usually bother with this, it is quite an effort to get these nails out."  But another said, " Wasn't it amazing how composed he was while on the cross, almost like he was detached from the experience. "
Then as they stood back from Jesus body they were sore alarmed to note how it seemed to age rapidly until almost at once it looked like that of an old man, bearing a resemblance to Eusebius or was it Clement of Alexandria ?

Saturday, 2 November 2013

Who is the twister ?

  • The Bible actually has an interesting idea about Satan twisting the words of the Bible or using interpretations which were not intended. It is quite often in life that the arguments which are nearly correct or a mix of fact and fantasy which catch people out the most effectively. For instance if you were trying to assess whether a project would be successful or not, you might conclude yes a goer and invest but it might fail due to some unforeseen bits of information. Or maybe people focus on one aspect of the argument but lose sight of the big picture or fail to investigate other important aspects.
    If twisted ideas are defined as the handy work of Satan then maybe most of the Bible is Satan's work ? It was certainly twisted genius which welded the few good ideas in the Bible onto the back of eternal concentration camp for the majority. 
    The brackish Bible crucifies humanity, tempts them in with some nice words about showing loving attitude to your neighbour and enemy & forgiveness, overlooking a multitude of sins etc but it is a pitcher plant to trap and digest you like a fly in its caustic hellish juices.
    Matthew 6v6 
    Jesus: When you pray go to your room and lock yourself away where no one else will see
    Satan: Don't bother praying, there is no supernatural realm to hear you. Even I am just some geezer clicking away on a computer keyboard in cyber space. It would be better for your mental health to get out more, take part in sport or travel, do something creative. On the other hand it could help to think through what would be the caring, helpful, humorous, clever thing to say in each situation.

      Luke 4v5 And John Loftus led the Christians up to a high place to show them world history

      The trouble with the Satan character in the Bible is that he is so pathetic in reasoning and clearly needed to read the books of John W. Loftus to get some real ammo in his kit.
      Maybe we should write, " The last testament of Christ " where Jesus returns to meet his nemesis; the Rambo antiChrist; John Loftus. Due to the impossibility of getting the original team of Jesus scriptwriters ( them being dead and gone ) we will just have to make do with the latest batch from Bible college.
      Luke 4v5 And John Loftus led the Christ(ians) up to a high place and showed them in an instant all the religions & philosophies of the world throughout recorded history. " How is it that elements of these religions & Greek philosophy that preceded Christianity are so similar to ideas in the Bible ? "
      But the Christians replied, " Do not put us to your outsider test of faith, we only want to hear what our minister tells us about the Bible, not read it for ourselves. Now let us go back to thinking of work, family & sport "
      When John Loftus had finished all this testing he left them until an opportune time

      Friday, 25 October 2013

      And Peter said to Jesus, " You are a Composite, the Son of many gods "

      Matt Ridley in " The rational optimist " p270 talks about how culture and technology advances by ideas having sex :
      " When Hero of Alexandria invented an ' aeoliphile ' or steam engine in the first century AD, and employed it in opening temple doors, the chances are that news of his invention spread so slowly and to so few people that it may never have reached the ears of cart designers. Ptolemaic astronomy was ingenious and precise, if not quite accurate, but it was never used for navigation, because astronomers and sailors did not meet. The secret of the modern world is its gigantic interconnectedness. Ideas are having sex with other ideas from all over the planet with ever- increasing promiscuity. The telephone had sex with the computer and spawned the internet. The first motor cars looked as though they were ' sired by the bicycle out of the horse carriage ' The idea for plastics came from photographic chemistry. Almost every technology is a hybrid "
      Maybe the Bible is a story of the mating of near eastern religions with Jesus as the mongrel son ? Was Jesus vaguely of referred to as the Son of Man because so many contributed their seed to the womb that it is impossible to decide who the father was ? His birth is remembered in the naivity scene because only the naive would fail to see the birth was delivered by priestly spin doctors.
      Matthew 16v15 " But what about you ? " Jesus asked, " Who do you say I am ? " Simon Peter answered, " You are the Composite, the son of many gods " 
      Jesus replied, " Blessed are you, this would never have been told to you by orthodoxy but has been revealed by John W. Loftus, Robert M. Price & others who sought the truth and found probabilities "
      Ken Humphreys is gives reasons to think Jesus never existed : " How did they know ? " http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

      Thursday, 24 October 2013

      Yesterday, today, tommorrow Jesus is always changing

      So what was the real history of Jerusalem ? I'll have to reread " The Bible Unearthed " by Israel Finkelstein for a proper account.
      For a rough guess sketch - Maybe the first religious site was a totem pole or Asherah pole that later had a Canaanite style temple built round, which was gradually filled with other superstitious statues and trinkets. The contents gradually changed as travelling priests passed through from Egypt and Babylon. The Temple gradually got added to, alterations and demolitions from battles occurred. Maybe it fell into disuse at times and recolonized by other people. The aural stories about the doctrines gradually being added to and morphing from one thing into another, the writings changing from proto semitic to western semitic to hebrew to greek. A constant wikipedia like evolution of ideas.
      Maybe not much different from modern churches. Even looking at gradually shifting of christian music, with the tunes drawing in ideas from pop music culture. Where the lyrics drop detail and focus more on vague ideas of love and trust.
      So really John 1v1 should say, " In the beginning was the Word, but it was very different from the one we now see in 3rd century CE "
      John 1v14 " The word became a historicized character "
      Malachi 3v6 " I the Lord am forever changing - just wait to you see what I'm like in the New Testament and I'll be unrecognizable by the time I get to 2013 "
      OR Malachi 3v6 " I the Lord never change ( unfortunately ), which could be part of the problem, perhaps it is time for a new regeneration of time lord, God Who ?
      Hebrews 13v8 Jesus Christ was different yesterday from the century before from the millennium before that, from 200 CE when he took final shape on paper, from 100 CE when the teacher of righteousness was just a gleam in the eye of a half crazed priest.
      Matthew 5v18 " Quit changing the smallest letters and strokes of the pen to try to make the text say whatever you want it to, my version is the final one ", " No it isn't you've hijacked it ", " Look here both of you, piss off, I was here first ", " No I have more authority and you'll be burnt at the stake if you don't beat it ", " We'll see about that "
      Rev 22v18 " I know how you lot keep adding and revising the religious stories but cut it out or else a thousand diseases be on you, the committee has agreed that my version is authoritative, so enough already "
      [ Hebrews 13v4, " The marriage bed should be kept pure, change the sheets at least once a month ", " Are you serious ? It needs to be once a week or I'm leaving you ", " Ah quit nagging ", " You don't appreciate me, none for you then ", " Aw come on dear, you know i love you really ", " All you can think of is sex ", " Darn, I can't win, I'm off to the pub ", " Door slams " ]

      Sunday, 20 October 2013

      Not guilty

      How is it that many religious leaders are guilty of with holding key bits of information from their congregations and yet apparently feel no guilt about doing so ? How come they don't feel guilty about closing down abortion clinics in USA ? [ Heard that info from Cher speaking on UK radio ] 

      Before I came across higher criticism of the Bible I used to worry, " What if I told people that there really was a hell and made them worry about something that didn't exist.but what if it does exist and i don't help them to avoid going there, how can anyone work out whether it exists or not, the ministers seem so have studied everything and haven't found any reasons to doubt it "
      I also used to worry, " What if I made them worry about hell but they weren't a chosen one so that their worry was for nothing and they would have been better just to enjoy their life and never mind about the inevitable. " 
      When it first dawned on me that hell was hardly mentioned in the old testament I guessed an excuse: that God didn't want to worry people about hell until after Jesus had opened up a route to heaven . However now I think it is more likely that the Jews hadn't considered the possibility of there being a hell until Alexander the Great's victories brought the spread of Greek thinking to the Jews. 
      It is possible to worry about not telling people the gospel and it is possible to worry about not telling people the reasons to think that the gospel is mostly fiction but my impression is that many people deal with these things by focusing on other interests so much that they forget religion.
      So my conclusion is that maybe i worry about these things a lot more than other people and maybe I should take a leaf out of their book and focus on sport, holidays, family, hobbies etc 
      Focus on what is optimistic and positive
      Is this what Luke 11v34 was starting to head for, " Your eye is the lamp of your body, When your eyes are good your whole body is full of light... See to it that the light within you is not darkness, read WIBA and see the reasons to think that the Bible is mostly dark fiction and it would not be loving or ethical to let anyone suffer after death, therefore don't worry about the Bible, just relax and enjoy life, eat, drink and be merry " ( slightly amended by me )
      The Bible is a whole ready made worry complex that has sent many folk on a guilt trip over nothing.

      Pack up your troubles in an old kit bag

      How do you go about filing all Bible worries away in an old kit bag and focusing on living a life full of variety & diversity ? Does there first need to be a more likely alternative explanation as to how the Bible stories got accepted by many as being true when they only have a few grains of reality to them ?
      From bible propaganda to WW1 propaganda :
      Pack up your troubles in your old kit-bag,
      And smile, smile, smile,
      While you've a Lucifer to light your fag,
      Smile, boys, that's the style.
      What's the use of worrying?
      It never was worth while, so
      Pack up your troubles in your old kit-bag,
      And smile, smile, smile.
      From Songfacts.com :
      The lyrics for this First World War marching song were written by George Henry Powell under the pseudonym of "George Asaf," and they were set to music by his brother Felix Powell. Although Felix was an enthusiastic staff sergeant in the British Army, George was a pacifist, and became a conscientious objector when conscription was imposed in 1916.
      The British music hall stars entered "Pack Up Your Troubles" in a wartime competition for the best morale-building song. It won first prize and became very popular, boosting British resolve despite the horrors of that war. Felix didn't follow the song's advice, as he committed suicide in 1942.
      Don't worry.. The lyric "While you've a lucifer to light your fag" doesn't have any satanic connotations. A "lucifer" was a popular make of match, and "fag"" is British slang for a cigarette.
      The song was recalled in the title of the 1932 Laurel and Hardy film Pack Up Your Troubles where the duo are drafted in the First World War. "Pack Up Your Troubles" is also featured in the beginning of the 1970 American musical film, Darling Lili sung by Julie Andrews.
      Among the artists who have recorded over the years are Helen Clark, Bob Crosby, Al Donahue, Spike Jones and Anthony Newley.
      The two brothers at first thought Felix's tune was a load of hogwash. "I played the tune over to George", Felix recalled to a journalist later. "He, without hesitation, pronounced it piffle. Having mutually agreed it was rubbish, it was consigned to a drawer labelled 'Duds.'" The song was saved from oblivion the following year when Felix and George entered it into a competition "as a joke". Felix recalled: "A few months later a wire came up to us at the Grand Theatre, Birmingham: PACK UP YOUR TROUBLES FIRST PRIZE. It gave George and me the best laugh of our lives. On the following Monday we put the song into our own show at Southampton in order to 'try it on the dog' so to speak. By the middle of the week we were as amused as we were delighted to hear thousands of troops singing it en route for the docks."
      Actually maybe if everyone in the first world war had worried more about the futility & pointlessness of that war then maybe the leaders would have been pressurized into negotiating a cease fire in 1914 or before it got going. Maybe worry serves a purpose if it can push effective research into the full story behind events or a better way forward.